
.. a good nic fix can change you
South American Sunset by roleATL
I've seen horrors... horrors that you've seen. But you have no right to call me a murderer. You have a right to kill me. You have a right to do that... but you have no right to judge me. It's impossible for words to describe what is necessary to those who do not know what horror means. Horror... Horror has a face... and you must make a friend of horror. Horror and moral terror are your friends. If they are not, then they are enemies to be feared. They are truly enemies! I remember when I was with Special Forces... seems a thousand centuries ago. We went into a camp to inoculate some children. We left the camp after we had inoculated the children for polio, and this old man came running after us and he was crying. He couldn't see. We went back there, and they had come and hacked off every inoculated arm. There they were in a pile. A pile of little arms. And I remember... I... I... I cried, I wept like some grandmother. I wanted to tear my teeth out; I didn't know what I wanted to do! And I want to remember it. I never want to forget it... I never want to forget. And then I realized... like I was shot... like I was shot with a diamond... a diamond bullet right through my forehead. And I thought, my God... the genius of that! The genius! The will to do that! Perfect, genuine, complete, crystalline, pure. And then I realized they were stronger than we, because they could stand that these were not monsters, these were men... trained cadres. These men who fought with their hearts, who had families, who had children, who were filled with love... but they had the strength... the strength... to do that. If I had ten divisions of those men, our troubles here would be over very quickly. You have to have men who are moral... and at the same time who are able to utilize their primordial instincts to kill without feeling... without passion... without judgment... without judgment! Because it's judgment that defeats us.
just can't stop... it's like a drug.
(sooo) so tired of running around by roleATL




There's nothing happy about this. This is maddening. I hate that I don't have the money right now to have a home for my children where they can all sleep under my roof, safe and sound. All I do is keep on producing this music, hoping it'll take off so I can get the house and attorneys it will take to free my daughter so she can be safe with her Dad from her mom's boyfriends and boyfriends roommates and so my oldest son will want to live with me, at least try it out. Divorce is a special hell for believers who love their children but don't have the blessing yet of cash.
so who won the superbowl? Jimmy crack corn, I'm outta step like minor threat
now you're caught up! This is the first track from the SxDc series, a kind of homage to San Diego.
Here's the swwooner for you u luvvers, actually produced during the same session as on my knees, right before it actually. I wasn't so sure of it, so I had to make another one, more party less holding hands in the moonlight.
Lord knows we could all use more holding hands in the moonlight.
Here you go.

.. of course it's all about trust right?
tumblr/blogger, y'all are 3 tracks behind bandcamp/soundcloud
This was dropped at like 2 on Friday (technically Sat morning), fitting for the Jameson, scuffies.
as my birthday nears, I wonder more and more why I bother.
I really am quit ok with all of this ending, and moving on to another plane; this time has here has shown me some beauty and love and I am grateful; but I am more and more lost in a wilderness of misery and in-completion.
I now know I wasn't meant to really pull this off, I've reached the plateau of what I could be even though something in my heart thinks knows I could do more, I could be more.
ET in the sky has confirmed, this is it. Making sub par broken beats and their equivalent on guitar, sitting in a cubicle and wishing for the life I only know in photos and movies.
My darling children, what is to become of them with a father like this? A hopeless dreamer who, despite his best efforts simply wasn't good enough
Now I almost don't even want to share this track with you. It's not like you're gonna "get it", that's just not possible.
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